Well I don’t know about you, but for me this month has been a funny one. I could have gone down the hysterical route a couple of times if I had allowed myself, and I don’t mean in the hilarious sense either. If you’d told me Mercury was in retrograde for the whole month I would have believed you, everything and anything played up.
Now we are here bobbing along into another month and I for one am hoping for a smoother ride. With February comes Valentine Day, so come on hands up how many of you know that you are going to be receiving flowers, chocolates, little pieces of jewellery or in the case of a proposal maybe a big piece of jewellery for Valentines.
I had desires for a Valentines demonstration of some sort or another for many a year, about 30 to be precise, (I have a lot of stamina) I waited in vain…it never happened. My other half never did give way to what he called “commercialism” he just didn’t buy into it.
It’s so obvious now that I was looking for an outward demonstration of love and relying on Valentine Day for that. It can be difficult watching lines of bouquets arriving in your workplace with friends and colleagues excitedly talking about Valentine weekends away and Valentine meals in or out, whilst in the meantime you have nothing to add to the conversation, apart from “Oh that’s nice”.
Eventually I saw the bigger picture and came to a place where I accepted that much love was offered to me every day, if only I’d look. I didn’t feel the need for a token gesture anymore, I recognised I had someone who stayed through thick and thin, who offered multitudes of little things every day and gave me huge space to grow and just to top it off brought a fantastic sense of humour to the relationship.
Most of all as cliché as it sounds, I found the place to love myself so it was no longer a demand on someone else.
The point I’m making is, rather than projecting outwards on to others for our fulfilment, if we take a deep breath and start to take a good look inside our own self and perhaps ask “why is there this need in me, what is it saying to me?” We are then able to resolve the anguish that we ourselves create.
So if Valentine Day rubs you up the wrong way, stop a moment, look inside and see what you can find.